NOTE:
Now under new Management British Petroleum purchased Acciona's interests in TURBINE LUST,
TURBINE LUST is an affordable all inclusive vacation enjoy hiking fitness , and fun you can feel good about ~ a clean green sustainable dream vacation.
Our Gorgeous green energy facility has been developed to provide people with a unique one of a kind experience.
Enjoy nature walks and partake in educational activities such as identifying and collecting bird and bat carcasses learn how to field dress turbine kill.
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Additionally, if you so choose you can take your carcass to the Turbine Kill Grill where Chef Carol Smurphy , will cook it to perfection .
Bon appetite !
Early risers are able to experience magnificent visual beauty as the morning sun rises behind the turbine fields, casting beams of light on their sleek white blades, creating A breathtaking panoramic view, hundreds of Majestic turbines, their blades spinning gracefully in the wind .
A gentle flicker ushers in a new day...
In the evenings kick back and Relax with our twenty-four hour Vibroacoustic massage, partake of the hypnotic nightly light stimulation therapy treatments .
Or book a twilight cruise on BP's luxury yacht, you will be enchanted by the twinkling glow of turbine lights gently strobing across the surface of the St. Lawrence River.
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A perfect end to a perfect day
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We offer many activities and entertainment opportunities as well.
Wind turbine tours.
Ever wonder what the inside of a turbine looks like? Wonder no more ,tour a real wind turbine .
Or play a game of Bird kill bingo ,(similar to cow pie bingo but without the methane.)
For entertainment, we provide a mock disaster and fire evacuation drills
For our more adventurous guests we offer Turbine base-jumping.
And for those not so adventurous ~ extreme ironing competitions.
Additionally, in the winter there is an annual Turbine Ice throw hockey tournament.
All this and much, much more.
Turbine lust resort is a True Turbine Utopia where all your dreams will come true.
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We offer many amenities such as earplugs and tinted strobe-filtering goggles, we also provide a variety of medications to make your turbine experience everything you hoped it would be...
No pets allowed!
However we do have a veterinarian on call 24 hours.
Yes, our vacation packages may cost more than your average vacation, but this is not your average vacation. Imagine how good you will feel knowing that you are doing your part to save the world.
All accommodations powered by green energy.
Located in the magnificent thousand Islands where the lake and the river meet
Book your dream vacation now. limited availability .
Operators are standing by, call now to book your dream vacation 1-800 -TURBINE 666
Note: Before booking guests must sign a liability waiver and a confidentiality /non disclosure agreement
LIABILITY RELEASE FORM
On this __________ day of ____________________, 20_____, intending to be legally bound hereby, the undersigned agrees and does hereby release from liability and to indemnify and hold harmless British Petroleum , and any of its employees or agents representing or related to Turbine Lust Resort in regard to resort Guest Visitation and Overnight Housing. This release is for any and all liability for personal injuries (including death) and property losses or damage occasioned by, or in connection with any activity or accommodations for this resort. The undersigned further agrees to abide by all the rules and regulations promulgated by British Petroleum and/or its affiliate groups and vendors throughout the Turbine Lust Visit.
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5 comments:
This is funny and timely. Timely becasue BP's Richard Chandler stated in his comments to the PSC on May 29, 2012 that his company's wind project in Cape Vincent could be as big as 285 MW. In BP's now defunct SDEIS they planned a bunch of 1.5 MW turbines to grace our town. If they plan to use the same 1.5 MW turbines, this means BP could be forwarding an application to the Article 10 siting board on August 4, 2012 to put 190 turbines all over the Town of Cape Vincent.
By the way, 190 turbines would be even more turbines than those depicted in the Turbine Lust graphic.
190 turbines would reach every corner of our fair town, every corner. Everyone would have a view, but only a few would have some cash.
190 turbines would be heard by everyone in our fair town, even those in adjoining towns would hear BP's Cape Wind Farm.
190 turbines would mean every single residential property in Cape Vincent would have some loss of property value.
190 turbines would mean lookout birdies and bats - stay clear of the Cape.
Think about how democratic BP's approach has now become. They are not going to violate the rights of a few in this town with some puny 20 turbine project. No, their objective is to violate all of us. One for all and all for one - how American.
Yes, Turbine Lust needed to be unearthed. You might call this Sunday, Unearthed Day!
I hear tell,Carol Smurphy is cooking up some crow for her pals at BP
Forget Metalcraft! Turbine Tourism! Now your're talking!
Unfortunately we must resort to parody sometimes to use as humorous device for expressing our sadness over what some are prepared to do Cape Vincent. The fact that a few among us brought all of this upon us is at the heart of the sadness.
Even if sanity prevails and the town is spared, the town will suffer the lingering effects of this betrayal for the forseeable future.
It would be a great addition to the Harvey White junkyard, veal pen tour complete with his flashing light met tower. Harvey could sit on the front parch and spin yarns about common sense and stuffing your pockets full of wind turbine welfare money.
And don't forget the Wiley and King museum of local political science.
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